The Minus Ad

Posted in: Uncategorized | By: | December 07, 2011

Rick Perry’s new ad is almost universally repulsive. And neither he nor his advisors seem to understand what is so offensive. (The ad is featured at the top of the Moorethink homepage.) In the span of thirty seconds the Texas governor manages to offend gays and lesbians as well as citizens who believe the constitution prohibits the intrusion of religion into public institutions. Good job, gov.

It’s too easy to call him an idjit, regardless of how accurate the accusation might be. In this particular instance, he knows what he’s doing. Republican pollster Mike Baselice, a reputable surveyor with fine credentials, has provided Perry’s team with numbers that indicate the governor may be moving up in Iowa. He’s in double figures at 11 percent. “We’re number four! We’re number four!” The gay bashing and god groping ad, though, is designed to get the attention of conservative evangelicals who turn out in large numbers for the Iowa caucuses. There were only about 120,000 people in the 2008 GOP caucus so it doesn’t take a monumental effort to move voters; especially when you are so eager to pander.

Evangelicals gave Mike Huckabee Iowa in the last election cycle. He’s got a TV show now. They can help Rick Perry win, too. Or get him a TV show. And he’s doing his best to let them know he thinks just like they do; Perry hates gay people, doesn’t want them to be able to marry, wants Jesus to tuck us all in at night, and no matter how many people are hungry or sick or unemployed, we shouldn’t turn to the government except when we want to say the pledge of allegiance or give money Israel. Amen.

And it just might work. Iowa is a steaming cauldron of Republican crazy, even in winter. And it takes a certain kind of motivation to run out into the cold on a school night and listen to political speeches at a community center or the post office and then vote for a candidate based on what you just heard or you saw on a repeating TV ad. When you think about the weather and combine it with the absurdity of the caucus process, it is a minor wonder that 120,000 people came out to play last time.

Which is why Rick Perry is spending $1.2 million on TV advertising to try to pump his poll numbers in the next few weeks. He wants to remind Iowans that he’s just like them – at least the evangelicals who are going to take part on January 3rd. Expect to see more ads showing him with his wife Anita and mentioning how they’ve been together since they met in eighth grade (subtle comparison to Newt Gingrich who changes wives about as often most people change the oil in their cars.) Rick isn’t going to talk much about jobs and the economy in Iowa. He’s got to motivate the people who are worried there are rainbow warriors sneaking down the corn rows to flaunt their same sex love of each other in their universal determination to destroy the institution of heterosexual marriage.

The people Perry is trying to reach don’t give a jolly good damn if he is stupid, (which, demonstrably, he is.) All they care about is that he loves Jesus and hates them homosexuals almost as much as he hates Washington, (though he can’t wait to get there.) Newt might scare them with his pseudo-intellect and his multiple wives and his millions of dollars made off of being a lobbyist for the guys who caused the mortgage and Wall Street collapse. Rick didn’t do any of that. He was down in Texas screwing up his home state.

But if he gets a chance, he’ll sure stick it to America, too.

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